Who makes you feel better and why

Connectedness - how you connect with yourself and others

Connectedness - from the longing to arrive

We all want that feeling of connection. This inner longing for connectedness may show up as a feeling of sadness, melancholy, inner restlessness and search. And so we try to fill this inner emptiness by doing a lot to connect with our environment, to please others, to experience recognition and appreciation. Through our appearance, our behavior, our job or our way of life, we try to establish connections and maybe even become people pleasers. And still notice that something is missing.

The connection outside depends on ourselves

Because the inner connection that we long for deep inside us cannot be satisfied by anything outside. Nobody can fill this void, except ourselves. Connection is associated with understanding, security, security, belonging, love. When we are connected, we don't feel alone, separate from others or ourselves. Basically, it's a desire for our original being. Because we are connected to everything. We are one with everything around us.


Also read: More rest, less stress - the big special with Annika Isterling


Questions to strengthen your own solidarity

So when we long for connectedness, it is an invitation to look inside. Listen to what our heart is telling us.

  • What do I really want from my heart?
  • How do I want to live?
  • What fills me and makes me really happy?
  • What do I want to give and leave behind in this world?
  • What gift, what talent do I have that I can share with the world?

Because basically it's not about taking. It's all about giving. To give something from the heart that makes you happy. What fills your soul.

Separation is just an illusion

Perhaps you would like to ask yourself the following questions today: What am I particularly good at, what is easy for me and what makes me feel free? How do I find myself? When you start to listen to yourself and to establish contact with your intuition, you will see what makes you really happy. What you need to feel really safe, secure, understood, loved and fulfilled. Because then you discover that everything you need is within you. That everything is there that you are desperately looking for in the outside world. That you are always connected, one with everything. And separation is just an illusion of the ego.

5 steps to connect with yourself

From my experience as a coach, the following steps are the most important to reconnect with yourself.

Step 1: Begin to consciously perceive the moment

Whether with your eyes closed or open, try to arrive at this moment again and again. You can think "Be there". Training your mindfulness is so valuable and important to be more aware of yourself.

Step 2: Start to feel more inside yourself and to meditate

That doesn't mean you have to sit still for hours. Of course you can, but meditation can also be easier, especially at the beginning. Take at least 20 minutes a day to listen to yourself. Feel your body. Focus on your breath. Be aware of your thoughts and feelings. Everything can be there. The more we accept what is currently there, the better it can go. Resistance increases, acceptance lets go.


Meditation tips for beginners:


Step 3: Be aware of your feelings

If the feeling had a color, what would it be? What shape would it have? Which surface? Now you can also change this feeling and, for example, adjust the color so that it feels good to you. Or the shape.

Step 4: listen to your intuition

Your intuition is your guide, your best friend. She knows what really fulfills you and makes you happy. The mind does not have to stand behind, but can form a team with your intuition. In order to perceive your intuition more strongly, intuitive writing, especially early in the morning right after waking up, is very helpful. Just start writing without evaluating. The more you do this, the more you will perceive your intuition.

Step 5: open your heart

For me, this is the most important step of all: to open your own heart again. As a child we are still completely free and connected to ourselves. Our hearts are open, we can give and receive love. At some point we may experience a situation in which we think it would be safer to close our hearts. But we do not notice that we are not protecting ourselves at all, we are only hurting ourselves. Because we separate ourselves from our heart, from the love within us. We part from giving love, but also receiving love. And that feeling of separation remains. And is the reason for our search for connection. The nice thing is: when you are connected to yourself again and have opened your heart, you also feel the connection to others again. Relationships become easier and more loving.


After studying business administration, Alexandra Molina worked in personnel management and marketing for an international group. Her interest in psychology and personality development was followed by training to become a certified personal and business coach and Journey Practitioner according to Brandon Bays. It supports women in reconnecting with their intuition, building trust and gaining inner freedom. You can also find more coaching exercises in her new book "Live more, love more, laugh more."


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